Paintbrush to Canvas
by TamedTempest
Summary: It was never supposed to end up like this. It was never supposed to get this far. I still can't believe I'm doing this with him. Complete, written before episode 5


I do not own The Legend of Korra. Such greatness belongs to Bryke and the team!

Thanks to my friend PK for all her help.

Read, enjoy, and please review! Your reviews make me a better writer.

Written before episode 5.

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_It was never supposed to end up like this. It was never supposed to get this far._

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**Paintbrush to Canvas**

It was never supposed to end up like this. It was never supposed to get this far. I still can't believe I'm doing this with him. Maybe I can still- Spirits, his touch is so gentle, so cautious, as if he's afraid I'll break. I try to steady my breathing, I have to stay focused, I have to get through this. I fix my eyes on the chandelier above me; I study the delicate curves of the frame, and the warm glow from the dancing flames.

_Breathe and focus. Get through this, get through this._ I chant my mantra.

Breathing, let alone focusing, is getting more difficult with each passing second. He's learning fast, adjusting his hands even to the slightest response. His hands slide up my side, and I can feel the heat radiating off of his body. His lips hover over my neck and his warm breath sends shivers down my spine. With each caress, his hands, just like his breath, are getting warmer, almost hot.

_Of course they are!_ I chided myself. _Of course they are. He's one of them, after all._

His breath is almost searing against my cool skin. I can't help but gasp as his lips finally make contact with my neck, slamming me back to the matter at hand. He pulls back abruptly and his amber eyes watch me intently.

"Did I do something wrong?" his concern is genuine.

"No, darling, of course not, you're doing great. You just startled me is all." I pray he doesn't hear the pitch of my voice change.

He isn't convinced. He sits up and swings his legs over the side of the bed.

"You're not comfortable with this, I can tell." It's a statement; he's not much for questions. He reaches for his shirt and starts to pull it over his head. "I don't want you to feel pressured."

"Mako! Wait!" I try to grab the shirt out of his hands. I've come too far, and I've finally worked up enough nerve. I tug at the shirt, he won't let go. "Mako, I don't feel pressured. I want to do this with you. Really, I do, I just- I'm a little nervous."

I quickly look away; I can't meet his gaze, not when he looks so concerned. I feel sick and pathetic, all I want to do is curl up and hide, but I tell myself this is the sacrifice I have to make. I have to take this step to ensure my success. I have to gain his trust.

Mako lets the shirt fall to the floor as he leans forward on one arm. He tilts my chin up until our eyes meet.

"Asami, listen, if you're not ready, we don't have to do this. I understand, and we can wait. I want to do this right."

"Then do it, silly!" My voice sounds shrill, even to my own ears.

I try to seductively pull him back over me. Instead, I pull too hard and Mako's knees slam into the floor as he trips face-first into the side of my bed.

"Oh my gosh! I am so sorry! Are you oaky?" I am such an idiot. Things were going so smoothly, I was so close, now I've ruined everything. My hands are trembling. "Mako? Are you okay?"

His shoulders are shaking. I was too busy panicking to notice he had been laughing the entire time. I sigh with relief; maybe I still have a chance. I let out a nervous giggle as Mako pulls himself up. He's towering over me and my eyes work their way up every inch of his bare skin.

"A little too eager, aren't we?" He smirks, leaning over to whisper in my ear. "How about we take this nice and slow?"

The torches and chandelier dim as Mako stands up. I always forget he can do that. I scramble back as Mako's body leans over mine again. The look he gives me makes my heart race. Do all firebenders' eyes burn so passionately? I close my eyes and breathe deep, trying to calm myself.

_Get through this, get through this._

Mako immediately picks up where he left off, gently planting a trail of soft kisses down my neck and across my collarbone. His cautious hands gently graze my sides again as he pulls me closer to him. I grip Mako's hair as he moves farther down. He's like an artist at work and I'm his masterpiece. His lips the paintbrush, my skin the canvas.

I never thought he'd fall so hard so fast. I had watched him for years, he always seemed so indifferent. Even when I read about his matches or heard his interviews on the radio, he seemed so untouchable, so unattainable. I could never have imagined this part of him existed. The part that was vulnerable, afraid, and above all, so human. He understands loss, and I know it still haunts him. That's why he's so careful, so gentle with his caresses, so timid with his advances.

I never thought it'd get this far. From the day I volunteered for reconnaissance or to the moment I deliberately hit Mako with my moped, I never thought it'd lead to this, to an _us_. I never thought he'd fall for me so fast. He's such a fool; I didn't think it would be this easy. He believed it all so easily. Yet, if I'm only doing this to bait him, why am I so anxious, so impatient, and so desperate for him to continue? Why do I want to feel every part of him?

_He's one of them and he needs to learn his place._ I try to control myself. _But maybe, I can save him._

My eyes fly open at that thought. Unintentionally, we make eye contact, my heart skips a beat. Maybe I'm the real fool in all this. I smile quickly and avert my gaze.

No, I can't afford to think like that. Not when it's gotten this far, but that pestering thought won't leave.

Maybe I can spare him. Maybe, just maybe, there's a chance I can save him. He's innocent, he hasn't done anything. In fact, he's more like us than we thought. We had studied benders as objects, not as people, right? We thought they all deserved to punishment, but what said all of them were the same? In fact, Mako was more like us then like _them. _Mako too lost his family at the hands of someone who was blinded by power. In reality, Mako never used his bending to hurt anyone; he only used it to get by in life. He's innocent. He and Bolin were wronged, just like we had been.

Maybe I can make the Lieutenant understand, maybe- I know I'm humoring myself. I know my reasoning is futile. I no longer have a say in the matter. I've been compromised and they'll know. I can lie to my father, I can lie to the Lieutenant, and maybe, I can even lie to Amon, but I know I can't lie to myself. I've fallen for this firebender and I can't hurt him. I won't. I run my fingers down his back, debating my next move. Maybe I should tell him the truth and warn him so he and Bolin can get to safety. He'd believe me, right? Maybe I- I'm humoring myself again.

"Mako."

He pulls back and smiles at me.

"You know Asami, getting run over by your moped was the best thing that's ever happened to me, " he says tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "I'm just glad I didn't break any bones."

I can't help but giggle. He's so naïve, so unaware of what awaits him.

"Mako, there's something I have to tell you," I sit up and slide back until I'm resting against the headboard. I want to look him in the eyes when I tell him the truth.

I think the seriousness of my expression scares him. He doesn't know what to expect, and I have no idea where to begin. I settle for the most direct route.

"I love you."

Before he can respond, I cup his face and kiss him as passionately as I can. If this is the only chance I have with Mako, I'm going to make it count. After a moment's hesitation, Mako kisses me back, and I know he feels the same.

I want him in his entirety, his flaws, insecurities, his dreams and his fears. I want to make him mine, mine forever. I press my body against his, I want to eliminate all distance between us. I can feel his heart racing, the torches and chandelier flicker, his skin is getting hot, I feel his temperature rising. He's a firebender after all. I'm starting to feel suffocated, I can't breathe, and I can feel my cheeks burning. Water, I need water. I break the kiss and pull back from him.

"Mako! Stop!"

I reach for the water jug by my bed side. I take a few gulps and splash my face. There, I can breathe again. Mako's staring at me in a mix of bewilderment and panic.

"It's okay Sweetie," I take a chance and stroke his cheek. My mistake, I pull back immediately. His body is still sweltering. "You're hot, I mean, your body temperature, it just got uncomfortable. I just needed a moment to breathe."

"Oh," he says softly as he examines his hand and body. "I didn't realize- When you said- I'm sorry. I'll be more careful, I promise."

I nod. I know he'd never hurt me.

Mako closes his eyes and rests his hands on his knees. He inhales in a few deep breaths and I can feel the room's atmosphere change. The heat is dissipating, as if he's drawing it all in. I've never seen this side of bending before, the gentle, spiritual side. All I know is the violence or the aggression I've witnessed firsthand. Despite Amon's venomous lies, bending could heal our world.

Being with Mako has taught me that. The serene look on his face breaks my heart. I don't want to hurt him, I can't. Suddenly, the torches and chandelier dim again, then flicker, and go completely out. I gasp and reach for Mako. I've never been afraid of the dark, but this darkness holds a truth I will soon have to face.

His body is much cooler, but his embrace is still warm and comforting. I really do feel safe with him. He wraps his arms around me and I pull myself closer. I want this moment to last forever, because after tonight, no matter what happens, it'll all be over soon. He is one of _them_ after all, it's not his doing, but that won't mean anything to Amon.

"I'm glad you said it first."

Even in the dark Mako's eyes seem to be glowing. Again, I can't help but wonder if all firebenders' eyes burn so passionately.

"I'm glad you said it first," Mako repeats. He runs his hands over my back protectively. "I don't know what I would have done if you didn't feel the same. I love you, Asami."

I rest my head on his shoulder and let him hold me. This is the only chance I have with him. The tears are finally flowing and I can do nothing to stop them. I feel Mako shiver as I let out a slow, shaky breath.

"That tickled," he says, chuckling softly. "It's okay, Asami, it's okay. You trust me, don't you?"

I swallow the lump in my throat and nod.

"I trust you with everything Mako, I feel so safe with you."

"I know," he kisses my forehead, "I'll always protect you."

The tears flow faster. I wish I could promise him the same.

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I hope you enjoyed it! This is for all my fellow Asami fans and conspiracy theorists alike.

In this story I did not want to ship anything, the idea came to me while I was watching the end of episode 4.

I like Asami and don't have anything against her. Give her a chance people! She's going to be a great character.

Here's to more great episodes!

Peace, love, and well wishes.

P.S. If I may, please be detailed in your reviews. Your feedback makes me a better writer.


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